


Be Serious (But Not That Serious)

by darkerstarss



Series: marvel one shots [4]
Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: Avengers - Freeform, Clint gives Wanda a pep-talk, Hawkeye - Freeform, Marvel - Freeform, Marvel Universe, No age gap, Other, Peptalk, Pregnant, Scarlet Witch - Freeform, So yeah, and half of it was written on a kindle fire, but I like the concept, dad-Clint, falcon - Freeform, mcu - Freeform, not sure if I like this story too much, scarlet falcon, scarletfalcon, wanda and sam are dating, wanda and same are close in age, wanda is pregnant
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-06-07
Updated: 2019-06-07
Packaged: 2020-04-11 15:54:38
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,135
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19112917
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/darkerstarss/pseuds/darkerstarss
Summary: “Sam, be serious.”“Alright, alright. I’m serious. Like murder.”OR in which Wanda Maximoff tries to find a way to tell her boyfriend she's pregnant





	Be Serious (But Not That Serious)

**Author's Note:**

> IMPORTANT
> 
> Wanda and Sam are the same age in this, or at least close in age. Maybe young thirites? I don't know, but I just found this ship and I low-key love it.  
> Why do I only like the rare-ships? It's painful.  
> Anyway, there will probably be more ScarletFalcon content later on, because I love it
> 
> ALSO  
> for those of you that wanted more Peter x Shuri, if you're reading this; I have not forgotten you and have a one-shot planned.

Wanda paced back and forth in her bedroom, small white stick in her hand, not caring to notice that she had left the door open. 

Mumbling to herself, she tried to find a way to tell him. "Hey Sam. How are things? How was the mission? I'm pregnant." Cussing under her breath, she shook her head. Maybe she could just tell him telepathically? Make him have a super-realistic dream about being a father? Maybe just have dream-Wanda announce it. 

No. She promised not to mess with her boyfriend's mind. 

"Hey Sam," she started again, still pacing. "How was the mission? By the way, you're going to be a dad." With a huff, the woman stopped and held up her hand to look at the test again. It still said positive. She was doomed. 

Well, maybe not doomed. Sam had never talked about disliking kids. He was always up to take a photo with one on the odd occasion he was recognized in public as the Falcon. But they hadn't talked about having their own kids. Their lives were hectic enough... 

"Hey Sam," Wanda began yet again, resuming her pacing and moving her arms as she spoke. "You remember that one time we met a little boy at the mall and you made a joke about us being parents? Surprise." Wanda groaned and used her free hand to rub her temple. 

Yeah. She was doomed. 

Suddenly, behind her, she heard a familiar voice. "Er... Wanda?" She turned quickly, hiding the pregnancy test behind her back, and saw Clint Barton standing in her open doorway, empty mug of coffee in his hand. "I was on my way to the kitchen, and I heard a bunch of 'hey Sam'ing." The woman swallowed and rocked on her heels a little bit, grip tightening around the stick in her hand. Neither of them spoke. "Alright then, guess you don't have to—" 

"I'm pregnant," Wanda announced quickly, cutting him off. He reacted with a small smile, and she let out a quiet sigh. 

"Uh, yeah. That much I gathered." Once again, an awkward silence filled the room. "So... You and Sam are gonna be parents." It wasn't a question, but she nodded. "Trying to find a way to tell him?" She nodded again, and with a little hesitation, Clint took a step inside the room. When Wanda didn't react, he took it as a good sign and leaned against the door frame. "I know it's none of my business, but... have you guys... talked about having kids?" 

Looking down at the ground, the Sokovian shook her head. "No." 

The archer nodded and scratched his head a bit, thinking. "Nervous?" 

Wanda rolled her eyes and allowed herself to chuckle. "How'd you know?" For the third time, a thick quiet fell between them. And then Wanda asked a question that Clint wasn't expecting. "How did... how did your wife tell you?" 

The man laughed and moved inside the room, sitting at the foot of the bed with the mug still clasped in his hand. Wanda sat next to him, bending over and propping herself on her elbows. “The first time... the first time was before she moved out to the farm, 'cause it was just us. We were living in DC, and I got home real late one night. She left me a saran-wrapped plate from dinner. I ate, then went back in the bedroom and found her watching tv and waiting for me. She turned off the television, sat me down on the bed and then said 'Clint, we're expecting.' Myself, being a dumba**, sat there and waited for her to tell me what we were expecting. After a minute or so I asked her, she almost slapped me and then told me it was a kid." He smiled as she finished the story, and Wanda tapped her foot anxiously. 

"How did you react?” The young woman bit her lip and moved her neck to look at him, still hunched over with her elbows digging into her knees. 

"Well... I was still working for SHIELD at the time, and despite being a highly trained spy, my first reaction was panic. I think I almost fainted... or did faint. It's kind of a blur." Wanda's shoulders stiffened. "But then I started to calm down and got really excited. At some point I called Natasha... then she yelled at me for waking her up at three in the morning. Then she congratulated me, and... well, life went on." 

With a sigh, Wanda looked down at the stick in her hands, straightening her back. “It’s just that… we’ve never really talked about being parents. Maybe once or twice, in abstract, but… we’ve never sat down and actually had a discussion. You wanted kids.” She paused and took a breath. “What if Sam doesn’t?” 

“Do you?” 

Hesitantly, Wanda nodded without looking up. 

As she continued staring at the test, face blank, the man moved his hand on her knee, and the woman looked back up at him. “If Sam doesn’t...” he stopped and let out a heavy sigh, knocking the ceramic mug against his leg lightly. “If he really doesn’t, then the both of you will figure it out. But I doubt he would ever, ever leave you Wanda. The way that man looks at you... I’d swear he sees the stars in your eyes.” 

Reluctantly, the woman let a smile creep up her face as she turned her neck to look at the man acting as her father. “You really think so?” 

“I mean, I just said it, didn’t I?” Clint laughed a little and moved his hand back to his own lap. “And if he does leave you, well... he’ll have two spies, a soldier, a robot, and a billionaire after him. He won’t live long.” Wanda allowed herself to laugh at his joke before suddenly reaching over and hugging the man. 

“Thank you,” she whispered as they pulled away. 

Clint began to stand up, mug still in hand as he made his way out of the room. “It’s my specialty, as dad-in-residence for the Avengers. Guess I’m gonna have some competition...” His rambling went silent as he made his way down the hallway to the kitchen to finally refill his coffee. 

Wanda looked back down at the pregnancy test, still in her hand, with a small smile. 

Maybe she wasn’t doomed. 

\--- 

Two days later, Sam returned home from the mission with Steve and Natasha. Upon entering the compound, the three of them first ran to their rooms to change out of dirty clothes before seeking out their teammates. Steve went for a nap, Natasha went looking for Clint, and Sam went searching for Wanda. 

He found his girlfriend in the kitchen, standing in front of a steaming pot of what smelled like chili (she had an affinity for spicy food; Sam was not fond of them, but he tolerated what she made). He stopped in the doorway to observe the woman as she added chili powder (too much for his liking), and crossed his arms as he leaned against the doorway. 

After a few moments, without looking up from her stirring, Wanda spoke. “Are you going to stand there forever or are you going to come say hello?” Her accent was thick on her tongue as she busied herself with cooking. 

With a smile and laughing shake of his head, Sam walked into the kitchen and to his girlfriend, giving her a small peck on the lips. “Hello.” He leaned over a bit to smell the contents of the pot, cringing as the spice hit his nose and he moved back a step. “Hungry?” 

The Sokovian woman shrugged. “And bored.” The man laughed as he opened a cabinet to take out two bowls, setting them on the counter as his girlfriend went to grab two spoons from a drawer. “How was the mission?” Wanda began ladling out servings of the chili into the both of the bowls as Sam took the sour cream and cheese from the fridge. 

“Ah, same old same old,” he sighed as he closed the fridge and returned to the counter, beginning to fix their chili the way they each liked it (Wanda ate hers plain; that was easy enough to remember). “Fought the bad guys, did some cool flips, looked totally awesome doing it.” 

His girlfriend eyes him humorously. “I’m sure you did.” 

Sam scoffed sarcastically as he began to return to extra ingredients to where they belonged. “Babe!” His voice was filled with mock offense as he laughed. “What’s that supposed to mean?” 

“I’m only joking,” Wanda chuckled as she carried both of their bowls to the kitchen table, her boyfriend joining her as they took their seats. Catching up over the last few days as they ate, Sam regaled her with tales of battle and she in turn spoke about the book she had finished since he was gone. 

After ten minutes or so, when both were nearing the bottom of their bowls (Sam added a lot of sour cream, okay?) Wanda cleared her throat and set her spoon down in her bowl, looking at her boyfriend with a sigh. “Sam, we need to talk.” 

“Uh oh. Am I in trouble?” he asked with a wink, but Wanda remained still-faced as she sat. “Oh, this is serious-serious.” He leaned back in his seat and looked at her a bit worriedly. “Are you about to dump me? Because let me assure you, I am a clingy ex-boyfriend.” 

Wanda shook her head and let out a small breath. “No... well... no.” She propped her arms up on the table leaning forward a bit. “Since you all left, there’s been... a development.” 

The dark-skinned man raised his eyebrow at her. “What kind of development? Like, end of the world or we ran out of potato chips?” She fought hard not to roll her eyes. 

“Sam, be serious.” 

He raised his hands in mock defense. “Alright, alright. I’m serious. Like murder.” 

Shaking off her boyfriend’s strange attempt at humor, Wanda continued. “I don’t really know how to say this... okay...” She took several deep breaths, averting her gaze to anywhere it wouldn’t meet Sam’s and trying to calm herself down. “Alright... here goes nothing I guess... Sam.” She looked back at him, and their eyes met as he examined her face. “I’m, I guess ‘we’re’... I’m pregnant.” 

Neither of them moved for a moment, in a sort of stunned silence, and the woman helf her breath. Then Sam asked a question, expression unreadable. “This isn’t a joke, right?” 

Wanda shook her head. “Surprise... I guess. I get it if you’re upset because I know we never really—” She was cut off mid-sentence as her boyfriend stood out of his chair and pulled her out of her own engulfing her in a hug with a grin plastered across his features. Arms pinned to her side, Wanda let out the breath she had been holding and let a smile dance on her lips. “So, does this mean you’re happy?” she asked into his shirt. 

With a laugh, he pulled away from the hug and looked at his girlfriend, tears of relief brimming in her eyes. “Did you think I wouldn’t be?” 

“I mean, maybe...” She looked at him sheepishly. “We’ve never actually talked about having our own kids, and I know you kind of like kids but I wasn’t sure if you actually wanted any of your own, and—” She was stopped once again, this time by the dark-skinned man pressing his lips against her own. 

“I’m happy, babe,” Sam assured her as he pulled away, still smiling. “I’m so happy. Have you told anyone else?” 

“Just Clint,” she explained. “He had to give me a pep-talk.” 

He looked at her funnily. “You were that nervous, huh?” 

“When you’re pregnant and you have to tell me, you can judge me,” she retorted with a laugh as a tear dripped down her face. “I’m just glad all this is over.” 

“I think it’s pretty far from over if you’re pregnant,” Sam quipped. Unexpectedly, he pulled Wanda into another hug, this time with her back against him, and rested his hand on her stomach. She flinched a bit, but soon got used to the touch. 

(As cliché as it is) They stood there like that for a long moment, just thinking and enjoying the feeling of being with one another. And then a certain Russian ex-spy walked into the kitchen. 

“What’s going on here?” she asked with a smirk. 

Sam gave her a goofy grin and pulled Wanda closer. “We’re pregnant.” 

The red-and-gold-haired woman gave a slight smile. “Congratulations.” With that, she served herself a bowl of chili and sat at the opposite end of the table, careful not to intrude on the moment.

**Author's Note:**

> Comment your thoughts. I like to hear from you guys.
> 
> Also if you have any requests for one-shots, I'm open to taking them.


End file.
